Friday, 30 August 2013

I Had A Dream....

I had a dream...when I was young, of being a parent.

Being a parent of three children.

It really didn't matter to me the gender of the children...I just wanted three children.

Those children to grow up together, play, get older, do well in school, achieve the best that they could in life, meet someone nice, get married, then, grandchildren would come along...

I had a dream.

All you want as a parent is for your children to be healthy and happy...

It's happened again.

Our third born little rascal is also affected by whatever genetic disorder has embedded itself into our other two children.

A routine hospital appointment with our rascal's consultant at our NICU showed that there is no tone in third born rascals arms and legs.

A routine appointment with rascal's physiotherapist has resulted in little rascal requiring piedro boots, just like our other rascals, a mobility bench, and a frame with body brace, all to try and assist with building up tone. Littlest rascal is also too small and too quiet, so, portage is also being drafted in just as our other two rascals have received.

It's hit me hard this time.

The heartbreak that not only have we gone through it with our first born, the incredible news that our second born was also affected, but the unbelievable, overwhelming news that our third born is also going through it, is really hard to take.

So, here starts the change in our lives.

We realise that we are in this for the long haul, and now that all three of our children are affected with delayed development, which involves mobility, gross and fine motor skills, and speech and language. Along with autism in rascal #1 and #2.

Recently, I have been asked a number of times..."how much more can you take?"

There's no answer to that. As a parent, you have no choice but to be there for your children, to be their strength, look after them and their needs, fight for them, and be their voice when they need you to be. 

Its a given rule as soon as you fall pregnant, that is your job description. 

There are no perks, days off, lunch hours or core working hours. All of their wants, needs and requests are your responsibilities. You have to answer to them, care for them, and just be there.

As a special needs parent, it all comes naturally...with the added bonus of exhaustion, stress and worry. Its a 24 hour job.

Even when we have a break away, our minds are with our children, wondering if they are ok, worrying probably unnecessarily about them. It's not really a break.

Hospital appointments are going to rise in number, involved specialists and professionals are offering fabulous support, and our job, as parents is to keep our sanity, and our rascals happy.

This is hard.

We are exhausted physically and mentally, but knowing the support that we have, and will have from family and professionals, we will make it through...we have no choice but to make it through. 

We will do it mostly with a smile on our faces because, although our children are affected as they are, they are our world, they are gorgeous and we wouldn't have imagined our lives without them.

I will, again, ask you to look at some charities that are close to our hearts: 

ACTION MEDICAL RESEARCH
JEANS FOR GENES
NATIONAL AUTISTIC SOCIETY


But yes, it breaks your heart as a parent, and grandparent. Like I said at the beginning, all you want as a parent is for your children to be healthy and happy....